I agree. My prayers for both….but I agree….Saeed NEEDS to deal with his stuff FIRST! Pray for them. The trust issue seems to be daunting. Whatever they do should NOT be played out on FB. It could be a starting point that they both agree to stay off social media so they can truly work on their marriage.
Experts on the dynamics of abuse strongly recommend separate, individual counseling for abuser and victim, not couples counseling. If abusers refuse to work through individual counseling on their personal issues, that creates a stumbling block to relational reconciliation.
This blog post was written by Julie Anne Smith, with contributions by Brad Sargent. The post was reviewed by Naghmeh Abedini.
- Counselors with expertise on dynamics of abuse recommend individualcounseling – for both the husband and wife – not couplescounseling. Couples counseling implies the abuse is equally both partners’ fault, when this type of abuse is definitely more one-sided. It will never be “fixed” if the abuser does not address the personal problem first, and couples counseling gives the abuser multiple opportunities to manipulate the situation and triangulate – get the counselor to side with him against the victim.
- On Valentine’s Day, Saeed Abedini sent a Facebook…
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