Striving to be the Proverbs Wife

It is so early.

The alarm goes off at 3:10 am.

My husband gets up and into the shower. I drag myself into the kitchen to start the coffee maker (no surprise there). By the time he comes out to the kitchen, his lunch is packed, coffee in his travel mug and his shoes are polished and waiting for him. I usually then sit down at the table with him and my cup of coffee for a few moments together. We have done this almost every single day he has gone to work for the last 18 years. A few times when a cranky baby has just fallen asleep in my arms I have missed doing this for my husband and I felt that I had missed something important. I had. I had missed my first opportunity of the new day to serve my husband.

I know I have heard from many women “friends” and acquaintances, this is something they would never do. Get up when their husband does and serve him.

“He is a big boy. He can do it himself!

” “I am not getting up just because he is. He can handle it without me.”

” You baby him too much!”

“You make me look bad. Don’t tell my husband what you do!”

“Why? He is an adult. Make him do it himself!”

“You are crazy! You will never see me getting up at that hour just to pack a lunch or make breakfast for my husband!”

I have been hurt by those comments in the past. I know I am seen by many as trying to make myself a version of June Cleaver. I do many things that are not as respected by other women in my generation. I stay home with my children. I clean my house. I make meals from scratch. I bake my own bread. I love to sew. I read my bible daily. I homeschool. I cater to my husband. It is true. My husband is an adult, big boy and old enough to do this stuff himself. Why should he? I was created by God to be his Helpmeet and I take that responsibility seriously. I see how blessed I am to have a husband who treats me so well. I am so blessed to have a man who is willing to get up at such an early hour to go to work and provide for his family. I am blessed to have a husband who allows me to stay home and not only raise our children but to homeschool them as well. My husband is constantly striving to do more to make our marriage stronger, our faith deeper and our family bonds tighter. He is a good man. Yes it is my privilege to serve and submit to him. This does not make me a weak wife or woman. I know there are women out there that love to tell me I am ruining their women’s rights movement. God calls us to do this. If I am to truly be a biblical wife and live the way God intends, then I must submit to my husband. For it is written often.

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:18

“Then when the king’s edict is proclaimed throughout all his vast realm, all the women will respect their husbands, from the least to the greatest.” Ester 1:20

“Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives,” 1 Peter 3:1

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Ephesians 5:22

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Ephesians 5:24

To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.”Genesis 3:16

I believe that this is a basic instruction before I leave earth from God. I was not raised to be this way.I was taught to never trust a man. I have had many moments of struggle with this. Often in my mind it was easier to just worry about what made me happy and go with that. I know very worldly. Once I put my defenses down and allowed God to work in me and I put my trust in Him, I saw how he sent me such a good man who truly loves me and wants for me to be happy. He sent me a man who I should trust, serve and be submissive to. He sent me a man who I am happy to serve. That is how marriage is supposed to be.  I serve him and he is happy. He then in turn wants to make me happy. I then am happy to serve him and the circle continues.

So here are some of the Proverbs that I strive to live by:

A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.  Proverbs  12:4

A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.  Proverbs 31:10

Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.  Proverbs 31:11

She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:12

In trying to be this way I am also encouraged to be the Titus woman as well.

Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. 

Titus 2:3-6

As I am a bit older than some, I share these words with you. I have found that the Lord blesses those who are persecuted in the name of the Lord. I know that I have been teased, and picked on for my choices of serving my husband but I have done this to follow the commands of the Lord. I have found that He continues to bless our marriage as we follow His teachings. So let others tease me and think I am crazy because my husband is a “big boy” and can “do things himself”. That is fine. I will continue to worship my Heavenly Father through submission to my husband and lead a life with a marriage that the Lord has smiled upon and continues to bless.

Proverbs Wife

(Picture from Biblical Marriage on Facebook)


I hope this is taken as an encouragement.

That is how it was written.

Women submit to your husbands and be blessed.


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